
On the first day of Christmas
The government gave to me…
A childcare policy for the under threes.

On the second day of Christmas
The government gave to me…
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the third day of Christmas
The government gave to me…
Three policy nerds
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the fourth day of Christmas
The government gave to me…
Four Ofsted friends
Three policy nerds
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the fifth day of Christmas
The government gave to me…
FIVE FUNDING STINGS!
Four Ofsted friends
Three policy nerds
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the sixth day of Christmas
The government gave to me…
Six staff a-sobbing
FIVE FUNDING STINGS!
Four Ofsted friends
Three policy nerds
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the seventh day of Christmas
The government gave to me…
Seven parents grumbling
Six staff a-sobbing
FIVE FUNDING STINGS!
Four Ofsted friends
Three policy nerds
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the eighth day of Christmas
The government gave to me:…
Eight apprentices training
Seven parents grumbling
Six staff a-sobbing
FIVE FUNDING STINGS!
Four Ofsted friends
Three policy nerds
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the ninth day of Christmas,
The government gave to me…
Nine services disappearing
Eight apprentices training
Seven parents grumbling
Six staff a-sobbing
FIVE FUNDING STINGS!
Four Ofsted friends
Three policy nerds
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the tenth day of Christmas
The government gave to me…
Ten taskforces wailing
Nine services disappearing
Eight apprentices training
Seven parents grumbling
Six staff a-sobbing
FIVE FUNDING STINGS!
Four Ofsted friends
Three policy nerds
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the eleventh day of Christmas
The government gave to me…
Eleven councils failing
Ten taskforces wailing
Nine services disappearing
Eight apprentices training
Seven parents grumbling
Six staff a-sobbing
FIVE FUNDING STINGS!
Four Ofsted friends
Three policy nerds
Two NIC shocks
And a childcare policy for the under threes.

On the twelfth day of Christmas
My husband said to me…
‘Stop worrying about government,
Let’s have a glass of wine under the pear tree.’

Happy Christmas, to 2025!
